A reflection on 2020; How I want to look after myself in the New Year

2020 has been one hell of  a year.

In all honesty I’ve learnt a lot about myself this year and I’ve not liked some of the things I’ve learnt. But amongst all of the sh*t and the lockdowns and the social distancing, I’ve learnt that I need to start respecting myself a bit more and doing things for me.

I just did a post on 8 steps for self-care as a new mum, but I’m 3 years in to my Mummy journey now and I think it’s time to really start looking after myself.

Over the last few months my fitness has really taken a dip (read: dive bomb) and quite frankly I have not wanted to even bother start working out again or doing anything remotely fitness related in weeks. In turn this has obviously left me feeling really quite sluggish and ‘fat’ and gross and a million other words you can use to describe feeling ‘bleugh’.

I have tried a few things to keep me feeling motivated but with loungewear  and pyjamas being my go-to for everyday dressing, there’s not been really anything to make me feel good about myself. *enter the pity party here*.

As Christmas is now over and the New Year has arrived, it’s definitely time to get myself moving again and I am actually looking forward to starting a new routine, some new products to help me out and start eating healthier again (or at least laying off massively on the chocolate and gingerbread men).

It’s not about caring what people think of me, but caring about how I feel in myself and I am not feeling good at the moment. I want 2021 to be about self confidence and choosing that healthier lifestyle again. 2020 was sh*t for many reasons but also because I lost myself in my mental health. I stopped exercising and focusing on eating well and just gave myself time to rest. I think the Lockdown’s were actually something I became grateful for in the end and honestly I am starting to prefer this way of life now… But there are times where we need to realise in ourselves that things need to change and that time for me has finally arrived.

I’ve given myself time now to enjoy wallowing and not care about what I’ve been eating and as the New Year approached I very much started to come out of myself and want to start making those positive changes again. I’m not on about ‘New Year, New Me’, because I’ve learnt a lot and grown from everything that’s happened in my life this year, but I am definitely now in a position where I’d like to work on myself again.

During the ‘limbo’ period between Christmas and New Year I’ve made myself move. I’ve swam, I’ve exercised (careful not to overdo myself too much) and I even ran my furthest distance since Feb! I’ve enjoyed getting back into something I truly love and am excited to move myself more now that the New Year is here, but I’m also grateful to myself for letting  myself rest and not pushing myself too hard at the tail end of last year. I needed a break and thank god I listened to my body and gave myself one. I have been known to be way too hard on myself and this year, that is definitely something I want to change. Long gone is the mantra of killing myself to be what everyone else deems as perfect and fresh in, is the new goal of putting myself first. Yes, I want to feel better in my body, but no that should not come as a result of killing myself in 2x workouts a day and going to bed exhausted every evening. I have a 3 year old; she wares me out enough as it is!

I guess what I’m really trying to get at is that although 2020 has been crappy in a plethora of ways, it’s actually been a great year to learn a lot of lessons and realise that actually it’s okay to go slower. As terrible as the pandemic has been, I’m grateful for the time with my daughter as a family and time I’ve had to rest and look after myself.

Here’s to 2021 …

*Outfits were kindly gifted by KatchMe

 

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* Outfits were kindly gifted by KatchMe