As we now get into the colder months and Autumn (finally) starts making an appearance I’ve found myself looking back over the year quite a lot. It felt like just seconds ago that I was heading back to Manchester after a break at Christmas to see my ex and celebrate New Years with him.. Now, it feels like I’ve blinked and all of a sudden, almost 10 months later (10?!?) I’m sat on my bed, living back in my family home in Wiltshire, sending out emails about my Christmas Gift Guides! In a way everything has gone so so quickly, but in others I’m kind of happy to see the end of this year as it’s been a very long and tiring one for me. Emotionally, I’ve been through a lot this year. I’ve been unhappy in my job and in my relationship and I’ve been so unhappy being away from my family that I definitely feel as if I lost a lot of myself over the course of the first few months of 2016. With my 22nd birthday and Christmas drawing ever closer now, I can’t help but think about how so many things have changed in the past two months since I’ve been home and how happy I am now.
As I sit and write this blog post I think I’m actually the happiest that I have been in years. Regardless of whether I lived here or in Manchester, I honestly think that right now I am at my happiest. I feel like I’m in such a positive place with my life at home, my job and even with a new relationship on the cards and everything just feels right. I don’t know if this blog post is going to make much sense at all really or if it’s just going to be me rambling again (apologies if it is) but I just had to write something down as everything seems to have just clicked into place recently. If there is one thing in life that my Mum and Dad have always drilled into me, it’s that nothing really matters unless you’re happy. I’ve always been taught that my happiness is the most important thing in life and I think until recently, I’ve taken that for granted. For the first time in my life, I am doing what I want to do. I am taking control of where I want to go and I’m not really letting anyone stop me on my way. After realising recently that I like to spend money (I have no idea why this is a new revelation to me), I’ve managed to get myself a part time job (as in like the least amount of hours you could imagine) at the Body Shop in my local town to just pay for my car every month and I’m actually spending as much time as I can on my blog. I am loving blogging ‘full time’ as much as I can and I’m actually excited to get up every day to start working on a new post or on getting out and taking some new photographs. Every day is different and I’m in charge of my timetable and nothing excites me more than that – I’ve definitely always been the one to hate to work under someone else’s shadow and I’m so happy that for the majority of the time, I’m now my own boss!
As far as everything else in my life is concerned, it’s also all going really well. I have the best friends around me imaginable, both here and in Manchester and I’ve completely rid myself of people who clearly don’t care about me as much as I do them. I’m definitely one of those friends who can be either super needy or super distant and all of the people in my life right now get that and are either okay with it or are exactly the same. I feel like I have my core friends sorted and with people like that in my life, I really don’t think I need much more. As far as this cheeky new relationship goes, it’s all very new. It’s not even technically a relationship as we’re just ‘seeing’ each other (whatever the hell that really means) but I am happy. For all of you nosey bitches out there, no, unless you’re one of my go-to gals for screen-shotting texts and late night advice, you probably won’t hear anything about him again after this post, but just know that I’m happy with how things are going. We’ve known each other for years so it’s not a new-new thing that I’m rushing into by any means, but it’s nice and I think that’s all that matters. I’ve also got my family back around me and nothing makes me happier than my family. We may be a messed up bunch and I may actually barely ever speak to them when I’m living in the same house as them, but just knowing that I am around them makes me happy. My younger sister is off living in Birmingham now which is odd, but it’s nice being around my older sister so much more. Even though there is a mighty age gap between us, we seem to always just understand each other and it’s been so lovely just being able to go over to her house of an evening and chat for hours and hours like we used to. I’m at an age now where we can just talk about everything and it’s really nice to have her so close to me again.
I guess the main point of this post was to tell you that I’m doing well. A lot of people I know from here and back in Manchester were worried about me when I first moved home and I just wanted to write this post to let you all know that I’m actually doing great. I think I also have needed to write this post to truly feel myself again. It sounds ridiculous, I know, but having the words spill out of me is really therapeutic and I know whole heartedly that I have made 100% the right decision to move back to Wiltshire and leave my life in Manchester behind. I mean, it’s been two months and I’m already the happiest I’ve been in years!
Being happy in life is easily the most important thing ever.
I just wanted to remind you all of that.
BekyLou, Beauty, Fashion, Fitness and Lifestyle Blog based in the South West.
(*this post may contain items gifted to me for PR purposes*)